GayDadsUSA

A wrap-up entry...

It's almost the end of the year, and I'm slowly copying all of my entries and then deleting them. I think I'm paid up on this site thru tomorrow and that's it and then ths, too, will be a thing of the past, but for those of you who will see this over the next (less than) 48 hours, I thought I'd write a few words.

We are now living in a great brownstone in Harlem. We moved out of our mold-infested, we later found out illegal apartment because the landlord never got a certificate of occupancy for it. In fact, New York One (the local cable news network in NYC) is interviewing us tomorrow. Citi-Habitats was the broker and they should have known better because of the lack of light and ventilation in the lower floor.

Juli is in a new school. I'm having to fight the district to pay for it, but it's good for her. They specialize in learning disabilities.

Mom moved in with us in September. It has had its own ups and downs but I'm glad she's here. She remains cancer-free, which is a miracle.

Seth, me, and Mom are going to family counseling at a place in  NYC that specializes in post-adoption issues. Juli will be brought into the mix later. They are amazing.

Seth and I are celebrating our third anniversary this week. He is wonderful and I continue to grow and be a better person because of him.

Finally, I finished yet another draft of a play I've literally been working on, off and on, since I was 29 and we are doing a reading this week, with a friend playing my part so I can hear the words aloud without actually being in it. I feel good about it. Seth is a great dramaturg and I've been working my butt off on it for months now.

That's it. I thought I'd be good about Facebook, but I'm not. However, I will have the same email linked to this site--gaydadsusa@gmail.com if anyone wants to write. Maybe I will send out periodic updates or, actually, update Facebook!

Take care and thanks to everyone for reading and sharing!

Getting ready for tomorrow

All I hope for tonight is sleep. Yesterday and today has been all about gathering test results, reports, and writing out questions for tomorrow's meeting. I've talked to parents, I've talked to "experts" and now it all comes down to me and what I ask for and how I ask it. I don't want to antagonize them (after all Juli has to go there everyday), but I also don't want to be Mr. Passive who accepts everything they say. The one huge thing we have going in our favor is that Juli's teacher is completely behind her and totally wants what is best for Juli. She gets her as a person. I'd be a complete wreck if she were with anyone else.

Keeping things in perspective

We went to an ovarian cancer benefit last night. Lots of Broadway people singing and dancing. Seth was playing for his friend Norm Lewis at the end of the first act and we thought it was early enough (7:00) that at least we could still get home by bedtime for Juli. Well, we ended up staying for the whole show, not the least of which was because after I sat down and read the program, I realized the benefit wasn't for the "cause" but for the woman who had worked as a dresser for all of these performers in various Broadway shows over the years...and she was sitting next to me in the front row.

Now what?

So, we're back. Our day and night on Fire Island was a wonderful escape, but it wasn't long enough. Having never been before, I had no idea what to expect. I loved that all Juli needed to be entertained was walking along the beach looking for shells and then doing some bird watching on a nature walk. However, now I'm back to reality and the IEP meeting at Juli's school is upon me this Friday.

A few minutes alone on a Friday night

Juli is in with her therapist right now. I'm out in the lobby, alone, typing. Ahh. I feel like I need a session everyday. I do have to say, all of these events of the last few weeks may finally force me to take up yoga/meditation. One of the things on my to do list for a while now. I may have no other choice. Well, I could go insane. But I'd prefer not to select that option if I can help it.

Gotta keep trucking

I knew I was really down when, for the first time ever, I called my therapist on his cell phone and said I needed to see him. (of course, being the nice Southern boy, I said on his voicemail that if not, I understood and I'd see him next Tuesday). He called me back and said would 2:00 work? I said, YES!

Tests, tests, and more tests

I took Juli to get updates on her tests that the child psychologist I hired last year did, the same woman who officially diagnosed Juli with dyslexia and working memory problems. This was on top of the poor kid being tested at school (bad coincidence) by the psychologist there yesterday and last Friday. She's gotta be sick of them...and so am I, quite frankly...especially the preliminary results I was told this morning.

And so it begins...

Yesterday Juli and Seth and I drove about 60 miles north of the city and went apple picking. It's great getting out of the city, especially when you drive north. You don't have to go very far before it's easy to leave the big city behind. The leaves are beginning to show their autumn colors and there's not a cab or crowd of people in sight...until we got to the apple place, of course. Until then, we were driving along this fun, back country road. I was so proud of myself that we were going to have this orchard all to ourselves. All of these other "pick your own" orchards I saw on-line had pictures of all of these crowds. Not this one. And the long, winding drive was proof to me there was no way anyone would find this place easily. Wrong!

Walk Softly

I went with Juli's class yesterday on their first of three bird watching field trips. I've spoken with Juli's teacher several times, but this was the first time I really saw her in action with the kids and it was the longest stretch of time I've spent with her. It was a very good lesson in how to speak to children.

The break broken

Ahh. Everyone is still asleep. For a few more minutes anyway. As much as I love Seth and Juli, this part of the morning is favorite. Always has been. It doesn't matter if I was waking up in New York City or Alaska. There's something about being awake when most everyone else is still asleep or maybe it's because it's a new day with new possibilities...or it could just mean responsibilities haven't kicked in it! 

Happy New Year

We just got back home from Long Island, where we spent the evening with Seth's Mom, one of his sisters (and her boyfriend), and Seth's friend Tim. Seth's Mom made a huge Rosh Hoshanah dinner that was delicious. It's pretty much the house Seth grew up in. Even his old bedroom has hardly changed. He's still got Playbills from shows in there he saw when he was a kid, along with Dynamites and Archie comics. However, as we were looking at some old picture albums, I was a bit overcome by the simple human fact that as we age, we lose people we love.